Math Misunderstanding
A boy comes home and tells his father, “I got an F in math.” Surprised, the father asks, “What happened?” The boy explains, “The teacher asked, ‘What’s 3 times 2?’ and I said 6.” The father replies, “That’s correct.” The boy adds, “Then she asked, ‘What’s 2 times 3?’” Confused, the father asks, “What’s the difference?” The boy exclaims, “That’s what I said!”
Do You Fart in Bed?
A husband’s loud morning farts drove his wife crazy, despite her warnings he’d “fart his guts out.” One Christmas morning, she emptied turkey guts into his underwear as a prank. Later, a scream echoed as he ran to the bathroom. When he returned, pale and shaken, he said, “You were right. I farted my guts out! But with God’s help, some Vaseline, and two fingers, I put most of them back in.”